Moment
This morning, I woke up when my alarm went off. Usually, I let it snooze for about an hour. We don't really need to wake up until 7:30 most mornings, so it's a bit silly that I set my alarm for 6:23 (random. I know). We got up, got ready. As I sent Jess off to work, I stepped out to water the garden. The sun wasn't quite up. I decided to sit on the front porch to watch it do it's thing.
And this is what I thought.
"Lauren, you should write a really inspiring blog post. You should write about how the sun peaked over the beautiful mountains of the Utah Valley, and how it gave you such a sense of excitement for the day, or the season, or the upcoming year. You could write about some of your deeper feelings on life, or maybe delve into some personal struggles, or write about some goals or accomplishments. Maybe a blog post about political issues, or something that has a greater social impact. Maybe you could write about something inspirational that you read, or even just a book review. A funny story or two might be nice. You could make some one smile. You could post pictures of hikes you've been on, along with some beautiful quotes. Maybe wax philosophical on how important it is to eat healthy, enjoy the great outdoors, and be happy. You should just get out there. Write something beautiful. Share it with the world, or at least your friends and family that read your blog.
But then I thought....
"Well, I don't think any post I write would be as awesome as I would want it to be. I don't think I have much to say that blog readers would care to hear about. Sure, I have thoughts about some of those things, but do I really want to expose myself on the blog for these folks to see? For one, what if I write something, put my heart and soul into it, and it doesn't receive the appreciate I am hoping for. I should just keep these thoughts to myself, and tell myself that people would appreciate them if they heard them, rather than actually letting these thoughts out, and realizing they're not appreciated, and then struggling with not basing myself worth on the appreciate of others. (Just typing that last bit was a little exhausting, and I'm not sure if it is even logical.) I should just share my "deep thoughts" when the moment feels right, during an actual conversation with some one."
Then, I replied to myself with...
"Put yourself out there. Write that blog post. Sure, you can share something meaningful with some one when you are talking to them as well, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't write some of your thoughts down as well. By writing them down, posting them on your little blog, you can express yourself in a way that is just not possible in the middle of a conversation. You can post images that magnify how you feel. You could take the time to write it out in a way that makes the most sense. Also, not seeing the appreciate from putting yourself out there does not equal being unappreciated. It just means some folks are quiet. Just like you are quiet. "
There you have it. I had my moment of inspiration, which lead to my moment of self-doubt. Which in turn, lead to my moment of back-talk. Which ended with me writing it all down. For you to silently appreciate, if you wish.
I am curious about how others feel about their blogs. Do they keep blogs as a way to connect to people, sharing important thoughts, make friends all around the nation or world? Or is it an easier way to keep friends and family updated on kids newest achievements or family events, as opposed to actually sending cards or e-mails? Do people blog because they feel they have something important to share with the world, or do they blog just to let stuff out, and other people come along and say "hey, this thing that you're letting out, it's important to a lot of people, and *bam*, your blog is popular".
And this is what I thought.
"Lauren, you should write a really inspiring blog post. You should write about how the sun peaked over the beautiful mountains of the Utah Valley, and how it gave you such a sense of excitement for the day, or the season, or the upcoming year. You could write about some of your deeper feelings on life, or maybe delve into some personal struggles, or write about some goals or accomplishments. Maybe a blog post about political issues, or something that has a greater social impact. Maybe you could write about something inspirational that you read, or even just a book review. A funny story or two might be nice. You could make some one smile. You could post pictures of hikes you've been on, along with some beautiful quotes. Maybe wax philosophical on how important it is to eat healthy, enjoy the great outdoors, and be happy. You should just get out there. Write something beautiful. Share it with the world, or at least your friends and family that read your blog.
But then I thought....
"Well, I don't think any post I write would be as awesome as I would want it to be. I don't think I have much to say that blog readers would care to hear about. Sure, I have thoughts about some of those things, but do I really want to expose myself on the blog for these folks to see? For one, what if I write something, put my heart and soul into it, and it doesn't receive the appreciate I am hoping for. I should just keep these thoughts to myself, and tell myself that people would appreciate them if they heard them, rather than actually letting these thoughts out, and realizing they're not appreciated, and then struggling with not basing myself worth on the appreciate of others. (Just typing that last bit was a little exhausting, and I'm not sure if it is even logical.) I should just share my "deep thoughts" when the moment feels right, during an actual conversation with some one."
Then, I replied to myself with...
"Put yourself out there. Write that blog post. Sure, you can share something meaningful with some one when you are talking to them as well, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't write some of your thoughts down as well. By writing them down, posting them on your little blog, you can express yourself in a way that is just not possible in the middle of a conversation. You can post images that magnify how you feel. You could take the time to write it out in a way that makes the most sense. Also, not seeing the appreciate from putting yourself out there does not equal being unappreciated. It just means some folks are quiet. Just like you are quiet. "
There you have it. I had my moment of inspiration, which lead to my moment of self-doubt. Which in turn, lead to my moment of back-talk. Which ended with me writing it all down. For you to silently appreciate, if you wish.
I am curious about how others feel about their blogs. Do they keep blogs as a way to connect to people, sharing important thoughts, make friends all around the nation or world? Or is it an easier way to keep friends and family updated on kids newest achievements or family events, as opposed to actually sending cards or e-mails? Do people blog because they feel they have something important to share with the world, or do they blog just to let stuff out, and other people come along and say "hey, this thing that you're letting out, it's important to a lot of people, and *bam*, your blog is popular".
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